Pop Quiz Time!

Ok, class, let's go over our Twin Etiquette!


1.) You see a woman in the store pushing a double stroller in front of her and pulling a cart behind her. You:

a) stop her to ask if the babies in the stroller are twins.

b) notice they are twins so don't ask anything so lame, instead stop her to ask her if she seen "Jon and Kate Plus Eight."

c) ask her opinion on the "octimom"

d) notice that she's pushing a stroller and pulling a cart while trying to remember what she came into the store for so you help her by clearing the path.



If you answered a) keep in mind she's had to answer this same question at least 47 times before you asked it.

If you answered b) keep in mind she has twins and doesn't have time to keep up with TLC gossip.

If you answered c) keep in mind she has even less time to watch the news.

If you answered d) give yourself a gold star, and a pat on the head. You already realise it probably took a lot to get those little twins to the store by herself, and you don't need to tell her she's got her hands full. You can see it and she already knows it.

That's all for now class!

Today's Twinnovation: Ourselves

Mother Nature (not the great out doors, but the nature of Mothers) is to feel guilt at the slightest thing. Second guessing ourselves seems to be the name of the game. I'm a big believer that books that teach you how to raise kids are from the very bowels of hell itself. And even if they're not written by men* they're prime objective seems to be making life as miserable as possible for the mother.

So here's my advice on books to help you raise your kids: if your child reads it, you can too.

What we as mothers really need is F.L.Y. Lady. (flylady.net)

Let's get one thing strait here, I'm probably the worst flybaby out there. But I figure if I were to wear myself out trying to be the perfect flybaby, Flylady would thwack me upside the head with her feather duster. Perfection is not the name of the game people!

The reason I recommend her site and her methods for young mothers like myself isn't because she tells you how to get you babies to sleep through the night. In fact, from the little I've seen of her site, I've seen little to nothing on the subject of raising kids. What she tells you how to do is for you. You can't control what your child does. CIO, STTN, Breastfeeding vs. Formula feeding, cloth diapering, Cribs vs. Co-sleeping, Sleeping on tummy, Pasicfires vs. No Pasicfires, SAHM vs. Working outside the home, Home school vs. Public school, Vaccinations, College funds, When to start solids, What solids to feed them..... none of it matters! Ok, well, yes it does matter, but most of that is out of your hands.

Case in point. Juice. I bought some juice for my boys. Miles loves it. Bob doesn't. Me wanting him to drink it isn't going to make it so. He's smarter than I am. He says "I don't want that. I'm not going to drink it." I can either A) Feel like a failure because I tried to give him juice and failed. Or B) Realise it is just juice and go on with life. From the moment I hand him the sippy cup it is out of my hands. Literally and figuratively. It's up to Bob to drink it. He has every right not to.

So often I see young mothers putting their success/failure feelings into things they have no control over... their kids. (I don't care who you are, you have no control over you kids. Accept it. Move on.)

But what Flylady helps you do is control the things you can control. You. Yourself. What you do. How you do it.

You want to take a walk everyday? Do it.

I can hear the excuses now.... to everyone of them I say "So!" I banish your excuses! Go for a walk!

You want to take the kids to the zoo? Do it!

You want the loneliness to end? Go find another young mother. She's just as lonely as you are. All young mothers are. Become friends.

What you can do, in the morning, what Flylady taught me, was to get ready for the day. Get dressed! (I figured while I was at it, I'd get my kids dressed too.)

Are you pictureing something like this:

A bright ray of morning sun shines through the window, and a gentle breeze plays with the white lace curtins of the open window. The air smells of morning dew and the promises of a day full of love and baby giggles. Mommy wakes up, having slept peacefully all night. She wieghs 10 pounds less than the day before. She gets out of bed and does a half hour of yoga, takes a nice long shower, gets dressed in the jeans that are the same size she wore in highschool, does her make-up even though her complection is flawless, and her hair is dry and perfect with just one swipe of the hair brush and a few seconds of the blow dryer. She goes into the nursry and sees two happy babies playing in their cribs, chattering at each other through the bars. They see her and smile and speak their very first words "Mommy, we changed ourselves so you wouldn't have to!"

Sorry, that's not what I meant, and it's never going to happen. The babies wake me up at the butt crack of dawn by crawling over my face so the pungent smell of baby shit despells any sleepness I might have left over from being up the night before.
Some mornings there's two poopie diapers first thing. Some mornings Miles is having a level 8 meltdown. Some mornings Bob doesn't want to wear clothes. Some mornings they laystill for a diaper change, other's they want to take a head dive off the changing table and I have to wrestle them to get a clean diaper on them.

But no metter what, I still get dressed! I might not get a shower-- scratch that, I never get a shower in the morning, are you kidding me?-- I might not do my make up, and what I wanted to wear might not fit me, but I still get dressed! I can control that. Some times I have to hand the babies my cell phone and a dead laptop to keep them from freaking out while I get dressed, but I still get dressed! Sometimes they still freak out. I still get dressed.

That's what Flylady did for me. That's why I recomend her site. If you want to improve how things are going with you and your baby/babies fix yourself. Look at your baby/babies, do you really think they need improving?

*Men should not be allowed to write books on what mothers should do as mothers.

Twininovation #1

Today's Twininovation comes from a friend of mine, a mother of a singlton, (but I don't like the sound of singltonnovate) who wanted to keep her baby girl's cloths looking nice without putting the time to soak every stain. She gave those spit-up stains the brush with one of these:

http://www.amazon.com/Sephora-Brand-Nail-Brush/dp/B00021BMOK/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=beauty&qid=1246318410&sr=8-2

That's right, a good ol' nail brush. Best of all we all probably have one hiding under our bathroom sink. And if you don't, you can get one at your local dollar store. I've tried it myself and it takes no time to scub out a mess!

Thanks Heather! You rock. In fact, I'm changing your name to Heather Rock. Because you do.

Meet the Fam

Here's me and Miles.

Next is Bob.

Ain't he cute?!

Here's Miles. He's a Polydactyl.

Here's Jeff with Bob.

He's a great daddy!

Ready, Set, Twinnovate!

It all started back in February 2k8.  The doc showed me what the ultrasound was picking up.  Of course I had no clue what she was trying to tell me because it looked like a couple of black blobs on a not so black background.  Wait... a couple? Two? What am I looking at? Are those my ovaries? It can't mean... "Twins?" Only couldn't say it because I had temporally forgotten all english I ever knew. Which is sad, 'cause it's my first language. I signed it in ASL. Only my doc doesn't know ASL so I signed it several times before I finally remembered the word in english. "Twins?" She nodded. Phew, I didn't look stupid.

Wait! What!? TWINS?! 0.o  

That was a year and a fistful of months ago.

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That was Miles.... back to what I was saying.

Now I'm the mother of twinfants, 9 months old (that's collectively one 18 month old for those of you keeping count) and I have to tell you, it is a whole different world.

After I found out, next came all the advice I couldn't use because I only knew a few people who had any experience with having twins. You know, advice like "sleep when the babies sleep." Right now is a great example of why that won't work. Miles is awake, Bob is asleep. And the stroller advice! I can't tell you how many people insisted I wouldn't want a side by side double stroller because I wouldn't be able to take it to the mall. 

The Mall!? Why would I go to the mall with my twins?! Do I look crazy? I don't even take them to the grocery store if I can avoid it! 

Anyway, it was the start of twinnovating for me. And I want to showcase my twinnovations here, on this blog, for all to see. Or, like with most blogs, for all not to ever know exist.